What is the Perfect Family?

Do you ever wonder what is the perfect family?

Do you get comments about your family size or gender of your kids? 

Do you often hear other people saying “your poor husband, all girls?”

Or “are you going to try for a boy now?”

“Are you going to keep having kids until you get that girl?”

“Only one, don’t you think they need a sibling? They are lonely.”

 “How many children do you have?” 

“Do you know where they come from?”

So, what is the perfect family size and makeup?

God’s Design for Our Family

God designs our family. Our family was planned out for us by Him. He has a purpose for how many children we have and what children are ours. 

Ultimately we are raising them for Him. 

Our job is to bring these souls to him so that they can live in eternity with their Heavenly Father one day. 

We get so wrapped up in worldly things that we forget that it isn’t about us. It’s never about us.

It’s about God. 

We are part of the story that leads to Him. 

Valuing our daughters

As a mother of girls, I hear all the comments. I know it happens to moms of boys too, but the personal experience I can speak from is for my daughters. 

My sweet little girls.

I’ll never forget a woman approaching me in the grocery store when I was pregnant with Addy and asking me what I was having. 

When I told her it was a girl she looked right at my two beautiful little girls in the cart and said “your poor husband.” 

Now it may have been pregnancy hormones combined with a hot summer day that made it impossible for me to hold my tongue, but I immediately responded with how happy he was and how much he loves being a girl dad. 

I’m not typically a snippy or rude person, but I’m sure the tone that erupted from my mouth that day was less than pleasant and respectful.

Mama bear was out in full force.

 I was so thankful they were too little at the time to understand what she was saying. 

But other girls are older and know what is being said.

What message does that send them about their worth? What are we saying to them? 

My daughters are a gift. A blessing. They are not less than boys. 

Fathers of All Girls

My husband has never seen having all girls as a bad thing. 

He never limits them because of their gender. 

He never thinks he can’t do some activity with them because they are girls. 

My girls know how to fish.

They go hunting.

My girls have been coached by their dad in sports. 

He works out with them and teaches them cross fit. 

He plays with dolls and colors. 

He takes them to sporting events.

He teaches them archery and how to shoot a gun. 

He may even have let them do hair chalk on him.  

He cheers them on at their events. 

He supports them. 

He loves being a girl dad. 

And he is such a great dad.

He loves them the way God created them. 

Family Size Matters?

In my life I have come to know that there are so many people going down different paths when it comes to their family journey.

Infertility.

Losing a child.

Adoption.

IVF.

Single mothers.

Only children.

I could go on and on.  

We criticize people for not having children or for only having one.  

But, then we also see the large families, we make negative comments to them as well.  

Why do we think big families are bad?  

Why can’t we just notice the beauty in all of our chaos? 

Can we attempt to only let loving comments that give life come out of our mouths?

Large families are beautiful and also part of God’s perfect plan.

Desires of Ours vs God’s

We all have our wants and desires, but God has a plan. 

And God’s plan is perfect, even if we don’t understand it. 

Our comments to others can be hurtful and damaging.

We never want a child to hear that we wish they were something or someone else. 

Imagine what that does to their psyche. How hurtful it can be. 

Every child is made in God’s image. Read that again. EVERY child is made in God’s image. 

They are special. They have a purpose. They should be seen as a valuable gift from God.

He planned your family. Never let anyone make you question what God has planned.

What does your family look like? Have you found yourself in any of the scenarios above?  Leave a comment below.