Lately, I’ve been asking the question about the role of confrontation in peacemaking. How do we Love Anyway when things need to change? How we juggle the fear we feel with the drive to be a part of the solution? A good friend of mine, “Shay” is a proud multi-racial Native American who has recently taken up the mantle of resistance at her children’s elementary school who uses The Redskins as their school mascot. Shay frequently posts screenshots of the... Read more
Credit: Photo by Emily Orlando on Unsplash When I was interviewing for my position with Preemptive Love, someone asked me what I was doing to live our preemptive love in my personal life. “I’m doing that locally,” I said. “What other way is there?” came the response. Exactly. If we can’t learn to be peacemakers right where we are, then chances are we won’t do it at all. I thought good and hard about that exchange afterward. Like most job interviews, I wished later... Read more
When my husband and I saw Black Panther a few weeks ago, it was with eager expectation to see black women represented wholly different than the tired baby mama, Aunt Jemima, or slave narrative typically offered. I’d heard great things about how black women in the film were portrayed as strong, intelligent leaders—and it did not disappoint. But I saw something even greater that I didn’t expect: black women as key stakeholders in the call for peace. Not just peace... Read more
It’s official. My sisters & I are taking over the guardianship + conservatorship for my Ma. We tried to work with her regarding her finances but she’s less than agreeable. My sister went down to her bank, shut it down & opened up a new account in our names. This took my Mother off guard, though almost everything does. That’s what ongoing Dementia & Paranoid Schizophrenia does to a 77 yr. old woman. She’s not firing on all engines, but... Read more
On Valentines Day, I sent my husband out to get me a Vegan pizza from Blaze & some Vegan-friendly Cashew ice cream (seriously it’s the best!) I told him I needed some comfort food badly. It had been a ROUGH day. It had been a “gone day.” A day marked by PMDD. PMDD (premenstrual dysphoric disorder) is a condition which throws you into extreme depression either a few days before or just into the beginning of your cycle.... Read more
I’ve been on a wholeness kick lately. Who am I kidding? I am becoming a wholeness chick. I’m talmbout full on: clean eating, #OrganicEverything, wellness obsessed, Yoga-doing, non-toxic, fitness chick in the making. Last year, I started pursuing health and wholeness in very intentional ways. Very. At first, it was born out of necessity. I knew I wasn’t going to survive NOT changing my whole life around. And really? It was just more of the same. For the few years... Read more
At our beach wedding we were given 2 leis. The use of leis in wedding ceremonies is a culturally significant tradition common in Hawaii. The lei symbolizes the mutual exchange of love & respect. At it’s advent, the lei was used as a peace agreement between Chiefs and that too is an unspoken aspect while swapping covenants & vows. This is why when you are in Hawaii, when someone hands you a lei never refuse. It’s considered to be rude... Read more
I see the curves of my breast and they please. I see the round of my rump and it entices. I see the button of my belly & giggle at its cuteness. I rub the bulging bump that sustains my daughter it is tight but lovely. My legs are thick pillars supporting the whole of us, two beating hearts. My areolas expand into flying saucers while my nipples take on an unyielding demeanor pushing past 3 sturdy layers to embarrass... Read more
Empathy. Many days, it’s awful. Being a broken empath? Nearly unbearable. I understand the “gift” of empathy. I understand that those of you who connect with my writing & have encouraged me to *finally* finish my memoir -or any book for that matter- see the spiritual gift of empathy in me. Being able to see & speak into the pain of others is a tremendously beautiful gift God has graciously allowed me to have to make my sista-frans & beautiful... Read more
When I was a kid my Ma often told me how things were ‘going to get better.’ She was never one to keep the hardships of life for me. I was the 4th, the unexpected later-in-life baby due to a bad hook-up after a tumultuous marriage to an alcoholic, years of single motherhood, crushing life disappointments, exhaustion from years on the Detroit police force, the beginnings of mental illness & of course the ever threatening presence of poverty. Then me.... Read more
Everyday Black Matters
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